My 8 Year-Old Self

Okay, so as my (fourth or fifth) re-introduction to blogging, I’ll be stealing a friend’s idea.  You can read about it HERE.

Basically, if I was to run into my 8 year-old self, what advice would I give?  What would I say?

“Hey Dweeb, stop letting your mum cut your hair.”

Really, here goes.

“You’re in for a tough few years.  Your mum is growing a brain tumour, and she’s going to be in the hospital for a while.  But don’t worry, she’ll be okay.

Don’t worry so much about fitting in with the other kids.  You’re weird, you’ll always be weird, own it.  People will like you much better if you stop trying to be like them and unapologetically be yourself.

That goes for moving to the rat-hole of a town where your family just moved.  You’ll make some great friends, you’ll make some rotten friends.  And your next ten years are going to see you getting more and more isolated because of the lack of stimulation in that town.   AGAIN, stop trying to make it work.  It won’t.  Bide your time, read, learn about the outside world and what you want to do in it.  You’ll avoid a lot of hurt by not trying to be like THEM.  You will get out, and you will have a great life.  Watch those “it gets better” videos on YouTube, they’re not just for the sexual minorities.

Speaking of which, you like girls, right?  That’s not going to change much.  But here’s a shocker.  You like guys too.  You just haven’t met an attractive one yet.  But when you do, it won’t be an issue.  One or two friends will turn their backs on you, but they don’t matter.  They have no value for you, and you’ll know this before you let them in on it.  The ones that count, the ones you trust, will stand by you.  Every one of them.  Your parents will be really upset because of their religious beliefs.  But when a couple of homophobic murders happen to other kids, they’ll see your value and support you as well.  Coming out to mum and dad will be one of the most important days of your life.  You will look back on it as the day you proved yourself, reassured that you’re the man you say you are.

Don’t get so stressed out about education.  Those people running your school have inflated egos, and are trying to get you to buy into “the system.”  Trying to brainwash you into working hard even though you’re a child.  Trying to make you think like everyone else, so that nobody challenges them.  Challenge them every chance you get.  Don’t be rude, don’t be offensive.  But stand your ground.  Ask ‘why’ every chance you get.  It’ll make you a better person, and you’ll come out winning in the end.  Or at lease at my time, nearly 40 years old.

Girls like you as much as you like them.  Don’t be so god-damned shy.  Talk to them like you would anyone else.  You’ll have A LOT more sex before you realize later in life that they just want a good shag sometimes too.  They’re not all waiting for a marriage proposal.”

Or do I just say this?

“Go nuts, live your life.  You’ll have some tough times.  You’ll have some good times.  It’ll toughen you up, and you’ll need that for the rest of your life.  But in the end, I think you’ll be a pretty good guy.”