I’m angry. No, I’m not angry. I’m more than that. I don't know what I am, 'furious' doesn’t even come close.
Two weeks ago a friend confided in me. It was about something so awful that it took a while to comprehend. I can’t talk to anyone about it, even Wife. That's a promise I won't break. Secrecy.
My closest friends have a higher value than my biological family. I would kill or die for them. So to be in this position where all I can do is listen and be emotional support is incredibly frustrating. I can’t resolve the situation. I can’t fix it. I can’t protect those I value. I feel helpless, and it’s adding to the feelings about the issue itself.
I’m not constantly brooding on the problem – sailing and working in my basement are distractions. But any other time it’s there lurking… It's starting to wear me down, but I can't think of what to do other than just eat it and wait for it to either implode or erode.